Heartbreak and How it Teaches Love

“Honey I don’t know if love is worth it.” –Corey Kilgannon // Rosanna (I’ll Be Here When the Moon is Tired)

Just at this very moment I heard this lyric. Okay, I need to get my mind set straight on this one. Am I in love? I don’t know, it doesn’t feel the same as the last time (maybe that’s a good thing though). But what does feel the same are the feelings of disappointment and heartbreak.

That feeling of someone hugging you, but not warming your heart at all.

That feeling of walking to your car, eyes blurry with tears, slamming the door and hitting your hands against the steering wheel as hard as you possibly can.

That feeling of blasting the most aggressive rock music you have in your CD dock to drain out your mind, your broken heart.

That feeling of someone saying something that sucks your heart out of your body and makes your face go white.

That feeling of sitting and crying while the person you love looks at you with frustration.

That feeling of someone wrapping their arms around you, but still shaking from pure fright of being alone again.

That feeling of looking like a complete mess from crying, but not caring because who do you have to look good for.

That is the feeling of heartbreak.

I’ve experienced that feeling more times then I would’ve liked. But I also think that’s okay. Because heartbreak, the reverse, dark side of love has taught me the most about myself.

So, it comes back to love being worth it. From what I've learned from having my heartbroken, I can say for a fact that it is. And while you may cry a lot and show emotions to people who you never wanted to, it makes you better. It made me better. Heartbreak taught me the most important things about love and emotions in general. 

Falling in love is the biggest risk you can take in your life. And loving another individual is the most terrifying roller coaster ride you will ever get on. Because when everything is strung from passion, feelings get hurt easily. I’ve come to learn that there is no way to fix that, only adapt to it. And though you may be incredibly connected with your lover, they will never understand your mind perfectly. But that’s love and like I said before…I love, love.