I see the world as Love

I see the world as love. A love that is so deep and powerful that you must walk away from it because it is so dangerous. Love, because that is all I really look for in life—the rush, the glance, the touch from someone else. However, that crazy feeling of love is just that, crazy. And I’m afraid of going crazy, it scares me. So, instead of facing my fears I walk away from the danger, the unknown, the crazy love. 

I see the world as two people who love each other too much. In fact, they love each other so much they know all the while they are together that the relationship will never workout in the end. For they are too similar, they dream too big. They love each other and their aspirations, but they don’t coincide and they are too big of dreamers to make sacrifices.

I am trapped, searching for love that I have already found, but don’t want to embrace. So, I leave my love behind and wonder why I am miserable. Wonder why my life is blue all the time, wonder why everything I do and see reminds me of that person I used to be so very fond of. The world is love because people created it to be that way. Because people long for attention and crave others touch, but are too self-centered to make the true sacrifices love requires. So, we all sit in the world, that is love, which we created, but don’t have true love because we are scared. Scared of the epic, incredible dream that I imagine to be love.

I see the world as shades of blue. Shades of blue that designate the sadness, the joy, and the calmness. The shade of blue you feel when the love of your life leaves you standing on the corner. The shade of blue you feel when you see him with another woman. The shade of blue you feel when you sit alone and cry because your heart is broken. 

I see the world as a back exit to a café. Because sitting inside recalling memories of beautiful times is just too much for your heart so you must step outback and smoke a cigarette to calm the nerves. The wretched smell of nicotine blocks out the aromas that were once good memories, but now are just threatening reminders of the past.

I see the world as white tee shirts. Shirts so essential and basic yet they still remind you of that time you went on your first date with him. And you leave his shirt at the bottom of your dresser drawer because it is much too dangerous to remind yourself, to smell him, to wear him.

I see the world as a place where you experience greatness, but never truly achieve it. 

I see the world as a place where you view beauty, but can never truly attain it.

I see the world as love with tears because how is it possible not to cry when your heart has been broken so many times.